I think this might be the next big thing

Dear agent,

I hear that you are looking for paranormal romances set during the French Revolution. You’d like to see the idea trending. Me too. I don’t have a work of that description handy, but I can send you my spec-fic novel set on Alpha Centauri in a matriarchal society of warrior apes. I’ll just change the frocks and chop off a few heads and Bob’s your uncle.

Research? No problem. I remember all the important bits from school: all the romantic nobles were guillotined while nasty old women catcalled beneath the scaffold while knitting woollen bonnets (or socks maybe); and Marie Antoinette told the revolting plebs to eat cake. Saw the film too. Come to think of it, the Alpha Centauri apes would fit in quite neatly for the executions scenes.

Romance is easy. It’s France, isn’t it? Ooh la la and all that. The girl who stabbed the guy in the tub would make a perfect kick-ass heroine. She would have to take out a whole bunch of the Republican Guard to make her more credible, of course. Do you think it would be too anachronistic to let her have a Winchester? The frocks weren’t all that different then, were they? That’s a detail we could discuss. I could add a scene in the Moulin Rouge for atmosphere (saw that film too). The frocks were pretty similar and the dance routines are very like the sacrificial rituals of my Alpha Centauri apes.

The paranormal part won’t be a problem since there will be so many ghosts floating about what with all the executions. Marie Antoinette would make a perfect vampire ghost, coming back to haunt her lover, the Marquis de Sade. Or was it the Count of Monte Cristo? Never mind, they all look the same in those powdered wigs, don’t they?

I’m getting so excited about this. I can see this idea being really big. What do you think?

Published by

Jane Dougherty

I used to do lots of things I didn't much enjoy. Now I am officially a writer. It's what I always wanted to be.

15 thoughts on “I think this might be the next big thing”

    1. What is really daft though is that I did see this on an agent’s wish list. So, when the web is flooded with high-kicking headless French princesses remember you heard it here first 🙂

      1. I’m sure he could! 😀

        It’s Good to be the King is a fantastic title – and now I want to go home and watch Robin Hood: Men in Tights. Again. Maybe after hubby goes to bed, Bubbles and I can pop it in. He’s been wanting to watch it all week, apparently. 🙂

    1. What’s sad is that since I wrote this post I’ve noticed quite a few books out there set in some historical period or other in France, and they are all awful. Awful because they pay not the slightest attention to period detail, society, or even basic geography. I even read the blurb of one so-called French medieval romance set in…1044 BC!!!!!

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