Not so Instagram

This is more of an apology than anything else. This morning, in an attempt to get up to speed with new technologies as us author types are supposed to,  I opened an Instagram account. I have a real aversion for social mediatry, posting pics, pointless inane comments and general time wasting and only ever got into it because publishers insist upon it. I used to FB in a bumbling sort of way, but seem to have lost the plot somewhere along the line. Goodreads I have never discovered how to work. Linkedin won’t let me access my account anymore—it probably died of boredom. Twitter, except for poetry is too fast and furious and no good for reaching book buyers as far as I can work out.

That leaves Tumblr (when I find out what it does I might approach it with something shorter than a ten foot pole) and Instagram. I got my account set up okay, then tried to post something, but it’s not that simple. You need to post via a telephone. To get the pics  or docs to the phone I think you have to send via FB. I don’t do things like that since the screen of my phone is about the size of a small matchbox and I never send messages because it takes so long, what with wiping the wrong letters and overriding the auto correct. Anything that requires connecting via a phone is a non-starter as far as I’m concerned.

So apologies are in order for the kind people who followed me to welcome me into the Instagram fold. I’m stuck in a time warp and can’t communicate with modern people. At least a blog uses words typed by my own fair fingers on my trusty computer, and pictures sent by cosmic carrier pigeon through said trusty computer. I know that without all this palaver, nobody outside my mystic inner circle is ever going to have even heard of my books. But that’s the way this particular cookie crumbles, until I find another way to get my books out there. Now, where did I put that magic lamp? Genie! Genie!

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Published by

Jane Dougherty

I used to do lots of things I didn't much enjoy. Now I am officially a writer. It's what I always wanted to be.

45 thoughts on “Not so Instagram”

  1. I don’t think it will matter, Jane. I’m on FB a lot, but not as an author, though I post my blog posts there. I still haven’t quite figured out Twitter. I sometimes check both from my phone, but I prefer typing on my computer. I sometimes post photos on Instagram–you can post to FB, not from it. But the photos I post don’t usually have anything to do with me as a writer or historian. I have a LinkedIn account, but I seldom use it. I don’t really get it. Goodreads just seems annoying to me. I haven’t been on Pinterest in nearly a year, I think.
    You can’t do it all–or you can, but not do anything else in your life. 🙂

    1. That’s how I feel. I never send messages because if I need to talk to someone I phone them; it’s so much quicker! I don’t use FB so the idea of using it as a platform to access another platform seems cranky to me, and if I have to use my phone to do it…

  2. This is so hilarious Genie!!!! Im in stitches giggling. How did we get so far from the basic remote control for the tv which seemed like the most luxurious thing at the time??!!???? Before that I remember trying to change the knob on the tv with the sweeping brush so I didn’t have to move!!!I’m rubbing the lamp for you Genie!

    1. Remote? I dumped the TV round about the same time my dad discovered the joys of the remote…and losing it. Did you have the same outbreaks of murderous rage in your house when Dad couldn’t remember where he’d put the remote?

  3. I use Instagram all the the time and can tell you you don’t need to rely on your phone’s camera. I transfer stuff to from my computer *cough* to the phone for uploading to instagram more often than not. I think I have your email address, Jane. I’ll send you an email about the site today.

    1. Thanks Juli. I’d be interested to see how it works in practice. It’s not relying on my phone’s camera that bothers me, it’s using my phone to do anything at all except phone that I can’t cope with. It takes anything up to three weeks to send a photo to my email so I don’t even use the camera much.

  4. Now your blog-related issues make more sense to me! 😀
    It is a daunting task though, sharing online on so many platforms, each with its own methods and rules (whims and quirks), not to mention the emotional energy required to be so ‘out there’, so to speak….. I wish you luck with your instgramming and I hope Santa comes around with a phone with a matchbox-and-a-half screen at least! 🙂

    1. I hope Santa doesn’t bother, to be honest. I wouldn’t have an excuse then 🙂 There’s something about all this fiddling and faffing around with gadgets that makes me incredibly impatient. All I want to do is write and for some kind understanding publisher to muck about with the boring stuff.

  5. Hi Jane…I get your position, though I do have to say that the new smart phones make everything so easy even I can do it!! But then there was the time that I was on a road trip and I had two phone…a table…and my laptop all going at the same time and I had to stop and laugh…really laugh…because I REALLY DON’T KNOW WHAT I AM DOING!! 🙂

    1. Like riding a bike. When you stop to think about it…you fall off 🙂 My youngest was helping me with my phobia. Watching her fingers flitting over the keyboard and then saying ‘Done. Now you just have to…’ And I say, you mean I have to do all the posting and stuff with my phone? No way! Life is just too short the way I manipulate that thing. Maybe I should just take anger management classes…

      1. Hahaha! Face the fear!!! 😉 Honestly, I am a walking advertisement for you…sooooo not techy…and yet I now feel I couldn’t live without my phone!! A little hint…I have a GIANT phone…Samsung Galaxy Note…their new one is coming out soon (or may already be out…not sure) but it is unbelievably easy…not to mention an awesome camera that makes it so easy to post photos directly from the phone. I sound like I am getting paid to endorse! hehe

  6. I feel little better today. At least I graduated to smartphone ( I hope) out of compulsion. Microsoft, for all their profound wisdom, dropped support to typing in many languages except English. Till Widows 8.1, one can download keyboard softwares and use the physical computer keyboard to type. Now in Windows 10, that is gone. They have a virtual keyboard in nearly every language in the world but you have to choose each key on your screen virtually making writing anything a slow process. Mapping of languages other than English to the physical keyboard must have been done by some MS moron. Completely non-intuitive.

    1. Unless the keyboard on the phone resembles the keyboard of a laptop in size and scope, I don’t want to know. My eyesight has begun to lengthen and I hate it. It makes the closeness of a tiny screen tiring and not being able to hit the right letter because they are so close together just sends me ballistic.

      1. What about all the other things retired people are supposed to do like learning another language, climbing Everest, visiting Patagonia, adopting a llama…The list is endless!

      2. I hope you do those things, and I’m pleased to hear you don’t intend to join the queue of big mountain tourists waiting to strew their litter over the slopes of Everest.

  7. You’re not alone, Jane. Goodreads buffaloes me. I have been reading the same book for a couple of years, apparently and informing Goodreads that I finished it has been next to impossible. Regards.

    1. I often receive invitations from authors to ‘events’ on Goodreads. I used to reply that yes, I would be going, then never heard any more about it. I often wonder where these events actually take place, and what people do there since it seems virtually impossible to have any interaction via Goodreads.

  8. Ha! Made me smile, this one. I blog, of course and I’m on Twitter and fb, but only to share blog posts, which happens automatically so I don’t have to think about it.
    I’m on Goodreads, but like you don’t actually know how you’re supposed to find readers that way (unless you’re prepared to write a lot of reviews, and quite honestly I need to spend more time writing, not on social media).
    It all just takes up so much time, dammit. How is anyone supposed to keep on top of all this stuff, write and still go to our paid jobs?
    We need Social Media fairies – ethereal beings who live off the negative vibrations from internet trolls and will work on our networks for free – or at least just for dry roasted peanuts and praise.

    1. I’m glad I’m not the only one who finds Goodreads unfathomable. If it were possible to communicate through it, like post a message to say ‘my book x is on promotion’ but you can’t. I get invited to Goodreads events and wonder what happens at them because even though I say I’ll go, nothing happens. I can’t write novels and blog, never mind do all that other chasing our tails stuff.

      1. Absolutely! Goodreads is fine for reviews, but for communicating with others – I just don’t see how it works. I think I need a tutorial in it :). And you’re right – tough enough to keep up with all the stuff we have to do, let alone all social media. Too many platforms, not enough time

      2. It was so simple in the old days. Your book was published, bookshops put it on their shelves, readers read the blurb, the first few pages, and if they liked it, they bought it. I know only a fraction of hopefuls ever saw their books in print, but those that made it that far at least sunk or swam on their merits, not on the length of time their authors spent on social media platforms.

      3. Very true. The most successful self published authors these days spend half of their time on promotion. Perhaps, sadly all prospective authors should gain marketing courses to see if they’re suited to that side of the job. Depressing, though

      4. Very true. Though it seems the better you are at the publicity side of writing, the more successful you’re likely to be. I better look for one of those courses for myself!

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