I called goodbye

Another circular poem, this one with a rhythm.

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I called goodbye to the empty air

Where you had been but moments past.

Last summer when love seemed so sure,

Pure as a the sky streaked white with cloud,

Loud sang the songbirds in the tree,

We laughed and loved through day and night.

Bright day dawning, swan takes flight,

Light me home, now, morning star,

Far away in the brightening sky,

I called goodbye to the empty air.

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Published by

Jane Dougherty

I used to do lots of things I didn't much enjoy. Now I am officially a writer. It's what I always wanted to be.

19 thoughts on “I called goodbye”

  1. Another really fine piece of writing J. Really beautiful and very Mary Webb (ironically and a compliment as I love her). A circle poem, the idea being ‘air’ and coming back to ‘air’ or the word of the initial focus. So perfectly done, it doesn’t artificially pull you back it leads you round in a circle.

    1. Thank you! I’m pleased with this one because it sticks to a meter which these kind of poems don’t as a rule. I say that because I made up the circular poem and line length and meter isn’t a rule I put in 🙂

      1. I can understand that. Thought it was like a method that was taught. Nice to learn that it can be adjusted to suit our own style then. Thanks Jane for explaining!

    1. Now now, Mr Feathers, I know you have a bit of a non-British accent, but to my mind the rhymes should work even to your ears. It’s end of line word with start of line word remember 🙂

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