In the primal darkness

For the Secret Keeper’s writing prompt. The words this week are:


Photo©Helgi Halldórsson


In primal darkness when the earth

Came to birth,

She spread her wings,

Embraced all things.


When first we dared to sing and dance

In magic trance,

Beneath the light

Of stars at night,


We sought to master all of life,

Created strife,

Our downfall pride,

The turning tide.


And now the dark rolls back again

With no birth pain,

No joyful cry,

This time we die.


Published by

Jane Dougherty

I used to do lots of things I didn't much enjoy. Now I am officially a writer. It's what I always wanted to be.

14 thoughts on “In the primal darkness”

  1. Here my beautiful friend is a perfect example of what I mentioned a month or so ago, your ability to write to a prompt using a good many words that are forced upon your inspiration and from this you create a poem that if anyone read, would never believe could have been purposely constructed with such contraints. I realize it is because you turn a potential constraint into something inspired, and that ability, that very weave of understanding word-use and inspiration which is rarely conscious, is your forte. You write as if you were carrying a beam of fire and were lit from the inside, yet unpicking the fire we see your stitches. I love that about your mind, you make me envious and much a fan of you my friend, thank you always for showing us how it is done.

    1. When you say these wonderful things I don’t recognize what I do, which is just to listen to the sound of the words. Who knows how much of that is a talent, and how much is just being able to join up sounds to make a ding dong that seems right to the ear? I love moulding words that’s all, but it gives me a tremendous feeling of satisfaction when someone else (in this case you) hears the same song 🙂

      1. I know. I loathe compliments, and whilst appreciative of them I find it very hard to believe them. What makes it worse is often people do not mean them. So much like those who over use words (love) I find myself very … suspicious of praise. That said, most of us need it. I was always criticized growing up all the time, never complimented, never even told I did anything well. I believe without being a mother, that you do need to praise your children (but not for everything). I try to encourage people as I was not. But when I really LOVE something that exceeds my mission to encourage. In your case it’s just an outpouring of appreciation for your talent. It is talent it’s NOTHING less than that. Moulding words. Yes that’s exactly it. You’d be good with clay. And music. And a great many other things I suspect my friend.

      2. You are so right about praise. It seems to be something that’s doled out like nuts at the zoo. Some writers seem to get more than their fair share of adulation, but if it’s just going to be nuts… You’re right about parental praise being so important. My mother didn’t go in for praise much, but she was so obviously generally proud of us that it didn’t matter. My dad used to fight over scraps of praise the same way we did 🙂

      3. Nice image (nuts/zoo) that’s so apropos (gorillas/mist/madness/nutty) like it! I like the idea of fighting over scraps of praise also. For me I seek sincerity in everything I say, and when I want to say more, when I really want to say OMG this is brilliant I seem to not find the words so the idea of being maybe thunderstruck by something really good is so true, I have felt that reading many of your poems FYI (and don’t forget 2017 shall bring our plan to fruition I am hoping!)

      4. Reserve brilliant for the true greats. I love praise since writing poetry is such a soul-baring experience it’s easy to feel discouraged, wrap oneself up and go back into hiding. My dad would be proud of me and that’s enough really. Even though he’s not here, I still sense him listening and adding his own embellishments 🙂

      5. I agree, I find the soul-baring part very hard and I almost do not want comments on the stuff that IS personal that’s why I p0st the personal stuff on the other site rather than TFS. So I totally get what you mean. It is good your dad would be proud of you – I do believe he is watching in his own way over you – love never dies. I feel the same way about my grandma.

      6. They are still there somewhere. Maybe just in our memory, and that’s maybe no consolation to them for being dead, but it means we have them close to us as long as we remember.

      7. Agreed. It always personally shocks me when someone can neglect a person who has passed simply because they are physically dead.

      8. People are very afraid of death, I think. Even ‘believers’ who ought to think it’s the lifetime achievement award. They don’t like to think about it so they have to stop thinking about the people who have died too.

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