Grey-leafed

Just got Internet back (again). The OctPoWriMo prompt, about ways of looking at things just about works for the triolet I wrote yesterday.

sky5

This sky is heavy with grey-leafed cloud

And rests on tree tops, dusty blue,

Waiting to pour its river loud.

The sky is heavy with grey-leafed cloud,

Branching, spreading over ploughed

And empty fields where barley grew.

This sky is heavy, and grey-leafed cloud

Rests on treetops misty blue.

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Published by

Jane Dougherty

I used to do lots of things I didn't much enjoy. Now I am officially a writer. It's what I always wanted to be.

23 thoughts on “Grey-leafed”

  1. Beautifully written! I love the image of “grey-leafed cloud” and I love how you change the repeating lines just a little bit at the end; it really makes the poem sparkle. Also, the triolet form is one of the reasons I fell in love with writing poetry, and sadly I don’t see many people use it. So this makes me happy. 🙂

    1. Thank you! I enjoy the triolet but sometimes the last repeat couplet comes over as just a repeat of the same and doesn’t add anything to the poem. It’s taking a bit of a liberty, but changing it just slightly can make a more interesting poem.

    1. Lost it again just after I posted. It’s come back now but there’s no guarantee it’ll last. The telephone man changed a plug. 45 minutes after he’d left intenet went off again. Ho hum.

      1. It isn’t. The internet provider says it’s the telephone line, the telephone operator says it’s a faulty plug (in me hole it is, it went off again less than an hour after he’d changed it) or else it’s the internet provider.

  2. With rhyme it gives a positive feeling. 😉 Congratulations having you back, Jane! Btw: I always deal with the bells of our parish church. The bell tower is exactly between our GSM antenna and the radio mast. The ringing of the bells disturbs our internet connection, four times a day. Michael

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