Evening drifts

For the dverse prompt.

 

Sinking sun sweeps

with broad brush

swallows

 

dip drinking deep

of rain-washed air

golden motes

 

fly gnat-winged

into dusty dusk

of gilded light

 

night brings wings

soft silent

owl-flutter

 

I watch the first star wake

rocked in the cobalt cradle

of the cosmos.

Published by

Jane Dougherty

I used to do lots of things I didn't much enjoy. Now I am officially a writer. It's what I always wanted to be.

43 thoughts on “Evening drifts”

      1. I shall have to write three-liners without looking for a haiku then. The words seem to know how to arrange themselves without me interfering ๐Ÿ™‚

  1. 5 stanzas, ode to darkness; your last stanza is very strong. In our night sky, it’s usually Venus that’s the first star. You wrote more modern haiku that punched hard with their muscled brevity.

    1. Thank you! Every day for an eternity we’ve had storms and lashing rain, and late evenings of utter calm. I think it must be to do with the tide ebbing. I’m pleased you enjoyed this.

  2. The sun sweeps, brushes, drinks (swallows). I like this version of the sun. It’s homey. And “night brings wings” (a terrific line!) from owls, though I wonder if the stars might also be given wings from night so that the stars can fly so high and all around. This is a firm and gentle way to end the day and bring on night.

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