Sod the packing. A poem for the dverse prompt about metaphor. I have a feeling I always do this, so I’m maybe missing the point. Here it is anyway.
And could I make this more than it is,
the vibrant light of morning,
rising to where the clouds cluster in gaudy flocks,
and the falling evening ocean,
bathing grass in pink and gold,
flecked with roistering homing birds?
Nothing I can say or do will change the quality of light,
the sky, a basking sea lit by coral stars its deep dark bed,
the trees that wave wild unkempt hair in the wind,
and in the dappling shadows,
the rust red, white scut flash of hart and hare.
You will always be the anchor in this wild sea,
the mirror, delicate as the clean washed strand,
and make me more than I could ever be alone.
Jane Dougherty Writes 
Love the images you brought forth… and the conceit that you give us, with the imagery being tied into a love poem in the end.. (I think you always do, but you better when you think about it)
Thank you. I think it has something to do with thinking visually. They’re not words so much as pictures.
I liked this description: “trees that wave wild unkempt hair in the wind” and the last three lines about the anchor.
Thank you, Frank 🙂
You’re right, you and we as poets in general, probably always do it without even thinking of it. That was the challenge though, the ready-set-metaphor! having to think about it. Beautiful imagery.
Maybe it isn’t such a good idea to think about it too much. There’s a risk of contrivance. I like the effect of splashing down what first springs to mind, even if it doesn’t always make perfect sense 🙂
Such a feel of completeness both in content and tone. Glad you ditched the moving stuff for a breath of creative fresh air, Jane!
We’re just submerged by boxes, almost all of them still open because we might have to fish something out again, and the cats get inside and make a mess of everything. It’s awful.
Pack the cats; trouble-makers
I’m worried about revenge attacks, you know, finding nasty ‘things’ in the boxes when we unpack. They’re funny critters, cats.
Hey, you made the choice to let them own you! Maybe a pet fish next time?
I don’t think we were actually given a choice. They both just walked in and took over. I can hear little Gollum-features meowling right now—yessss, fishesss, lots of fishessss…
Hahaha! Get dogs.
We have a sighthound instead. It’s less restful than a dog 🙂
I agree- sod the packing…. this is much preferable. I like- a basking sea lit by coral stars its deep dark bed- it reminds me of sailing on the west coast of Scotland with my parents when I was younger and we saw basking sharks..and the sea was endless azure mirror, and then at night the phosphorescence made it look like the stars were twinkling in the sea.
I think you should write a poem about it…you just did!
Soooooo much love for these lines:
“the sky, a basking sea lit by coral stars its deep dark bed,
the trees that wave wild unkempt hair in the wind”
Thank you 🙂 I like to splash the colour about 🙂
Love the imagery! What do the cats think of it? My cats are my audience and wily critics! Lol
Thank you! The cats just love all the boxes. Neither of them search out comfy places to sleep so a slippery cardboard surface is just fine.
Love the “you will always be the anchor in this wild sea” … what better metaphor for true love!
Thanks Beverly. It feels like such an apt one. The wind and the rain help it along 🙂
I’m not allowed to have cats anymore because I had to put my last one down and it truly broke my heart. I miss cats. I love the images and the love in this poem – “and make me more than I could ever be alone? that last line totally grabbed my heart.
We’ve lost three male cats and only one to old age. The other two were young and healthy one minute, dying of kidney failure and cat AIDS the next. I cried and cried, but you can’t stop the strays wandering in. We’re on an emotional high at the moment, packing up and leaving the house that has seen the children grow to young adults. The weather is tumultuous, I’m having migraine after migraine, and it’s easy to get carried away.
My favorite metaphor in here has to be the one where the sun rises to where the clouds cluster in gaudy flocks. Gaudy because of the reflected sunrise. Really nice.
Thank you 🙂 The colours of the sky are unbeatable. I never understand why people want to enhance the natural colours in their photos.
Seriously! Talk about gilding the lily.
That’s exactly the expression 🙂
I finished reading with a sigh of satisfaction. I like the way the sea-based metaphors circle round this poem, ending with the anchor of love.
Thanks Sarah. The ocean is close and the skies reflect it. I’m always aware that the estuary begins around the bend in the river.
Too right, sod the packing, Jane! A poem and a cup of tea (or whatever grabs your fancy) is the antidote to stressful situations – and moving house is right up there at the top of the list.
I love the opening of your poem, as if it had already started, which the light of morning already has when we first notice it, in some other part of the country/world. I love the lines:
‘rising to where the clouds cluster in gaudy flocks,
and the falling evening ocean’
and
‘…in the dappling shadows,
the rust red, white scut flash of hart and hare’.
My kind of landscape.
Thanks Kim 🙂 The weather is so changeable, like early spring, we can’t take calm blue skies for granted.
Many beautiful words adorn your poem but the close is what wraps it all up with a warm heart-melting embrace. One’s life packed in boxes huh? Metaphor there methinks 😉
There’s an awful lot that isn’t going into the boxes, and I’m turning a cold eye on it all. Husband is finding it a wrench though.
Exceptionallyrics beautiful, this one. (K)
Thanks Kerfe 🙂
Nice! I love the creativity!
Thank you!
I loved the “coral stars.” It’s a beautiful piece of imagery.
Thank you, and apologies for the delay in replying—we moved on the 18th and have only just got internet.
Really loved the beauty of this 😊
Thank you 🙂
Absolutely beautiful. An ode to one’s lover. I especially love these words
“the trees that wave wild unkempt hair in the wind,”
Thanks Lillian. Sorry to be so late replying. We moved on the 18th and have only just got internet back.
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Thank you, Michael!